Wake Up And Smell The Google Coffee
Have You Had Your Google Coffee Yet?
It amazes me the emails we still get. People asking for link exchanges and people asking to pay for links STILL. They must not be reading the latest SEO news and updates from Google or anywhere.
I saved a few as I thought they would be fun for a blog post here. I will not share the email addresses of course.
“Dear Webmaster,
While browsing for “Health” over Google, I stumbled across your website. I found its content relevant to our www.xxx.de I would like to be associated with your website.
Would you kindly consider adding our details at: http://www.fancyscrubs.com/resources” rel=”nofollow”
Thanking you for consideration. Our web details are:_____”
“Hello,
My Name is Sam.
I discovered your site http://www.fancylingeriestore.
personally feel that you are posting High Quality Content very effectively so it
will fit perfectly into our collection of quality links.
If you are interested to exchange the links, please send me the
following details of your site:
Title, Url and Description
I’ll add your link as soon as possible, in the next 24 hours. As soon
as it’s ready, I’ll send you a confirmation email.
I will appreciate it if you place a link back to our site using the
following HTML code (just copy and paste it into your links page):”
So we have only 24 hours? What happens after that? Tick-tock, tick-tock….
And here is another classic email:
“Hi, I recently researched your website www.fancyscrubs.com during a routine survey of sites which may be capable of higher search engine performance through Search Engine Optimization (SEO). Efficient SEO brings an increase in online sales or leads. I hope this information may be of use to you, if not then I apologies for any inconvenience caused. So, here’s a summary of my findings on your site:
- Your Google Page rank is 0/10
- You have 0/10 back-links
- Your website has 0/15 pages indexed
I’m going somewhere with all this… I wanted to do my homework and research your website because I want to show you that I have applied some research to your website before contacting you with my proposal. We are in the business of offering 3 benefits for your website:
- Diagnosing and fixing all issues with your website
- Ranking your site to the top of the search results
- Significantly increasing your online revenue levels
Let me know if you would be interested in talking further. Just provide us with your name and phone number so that we can contact you directly. I can have one of the team members send you more details and schedule a call. Once we have some more information about your company, online goals and sales expectations, we would be pleased to provide you a detailed report showing where your site stands in relation to the competition in your industry. We look forward to hearing back from you.
- John”
Interesting – He DID his homework? Our Google Pagerank is 4. We do have backlinks. The count varies depending which service and which of the main search engines you use. According to our webmaster tools we have over 1100 pages indexed. So where was this person getting their research from? Of course our websites could use higher search engine performance but with that kind of research I can’t imagine what they would do with these outdated tactics.
It just amazes me people are still using these outdated practices for SEO. They probably have not heard of the Google Panda or Google Penguin. Maybe I should respond to the next email with SEO hints for them to review?
Do you STILL receive any emails like these on SEO for your blog or website?






Oh Lisa
Ohw… LOL… You made my day
Actually John (I think it’s not his real name) has got unspoken talent in writing hilarious emails. I think you should welcome them to your blog here and let them learn free of charge about SEO tactics. If he don’t get anything about SEO, let him know he has got talent of being a comedy star. Oh poor marketers, I bet we will do better than them if we got into that way
However it’s such annoying and this time I don’t get angry of them, actually got pity
Why they just don’t use their energy to do something worthy? There’s many people willing to work as real marketers, but such lame guys got opportunities and waste others’ time.
Glad you come up with this topic Lisa
Really cool… and should spread more… It’s better if you can invite ‘em to see this one
They are featured today. It’s such an honour to ‘em.
Cheers…
Glad that one made your day Mayura
I may consider emailing that back next time. Thanks.
Not only do I get emails like that but I used to get spammer comments on my old wordpress blog like that. Truly irritating. I just delete em and laugh at their stupidity. Thanks for the morning chuckle!
Happy Hump Day!
Thanks Brenda. Glad I could put them to good use for a laugh. Hope your day is well too. Working towards that Friday.
Hey Lisa,
Glad to see you come with this topic… !!
haha what a great collection of emails. I don’t get frustrated with these type of emails, actually mails like those make me laugh..
!!
Thanks for sharing this nice post, lisa…!
Devesh recently posted..Have You Achieved Your Short Term Goals?
Ohh GOD that mean I’m not the only one who get emails like this. I also get a lot of emails like this but I always throw those emails to Trash
because I don’t actually like receiving emails like this.
Ehsan recently posted..5 Great Blogging Infographics To Enhance Your Knowledge of Blogging
Hi Ehsan, no – you are not alone
That’s what I did too – trash them until I saw some humor in them. Thanks for coming by and commenting today.
Hi Lisa,
I know it’s ridiculous. I receive emails like these all the time and they smell spam form far, far away. I am like you I can’t believe some people still do this.
Thanks for sharing this
Sylviane Nuccio recently posted..Why Are You Still Broke?
Hi Sylviane, I know – it really amazed me to still get these. Thanks for coming by and commenting.
Yes Lisa I still do receive these emails.
It is interesting some of the verbiage they use and especially the one about ‘doing their homework’. That amazes me that they know so much about ‘your’ site! I’m glad that you shared this today because it is a great way to spread the word about SEO and how it really has changed over time.
Maybe the will come back to your site and see your post and they will finally get a helpful hint to stop wasting time with those emails and start actually building real online community and relationships.
Lynn Brown recently posted..Best 4 Blogging Tips for Small Business Owners
Hi Lynn, isn’t it just amazing? I know, I’m thinking of returning the SEO hints back at them
H aha I get these too. I just delete. I don’t do link trades anymore. I add links based on what I find useful. Honestly, even when it was relevant I didn’t bother much. I just try to spend my time generating useful, quality content. Eventually Google will catch on to ME.
Michelle recently posted..How to Save Money on Skin Care Products
Thanks Michelle for coming by. I’m glad those days are over and Google favors more natural things for SEO.
I am still not all that clear on SEO. But at least I can say after Bloggy Boot Camp I am at least familiar with the terms Google Panda and Google Pinguine. Taking baby steps
Chasing Joy recently posted..Free Printable: Joy Bookmarks
It changes so fast too, you’ll have to fill us in on that Bloggy Boot Camp; sounds like fun
It is annoying but while there are people out there buy snake oil people will sell it, dont feel like you are been singled out, those emails most likely go to a million people and if they get 10 take ups they will do alright.
The best one I ever had was someone called me and said that he could improve my site, after talking to him for 20 min on the phone and hearing him out he said he would send me a free report and asked me for my URL!
laura recently posted..http://isitheartburn.com
I still get those too Lisa can you imagine! They say my blog isn’t ranking on Google and of course, they can definitely “help” me with that. I still laugh at those and of course, instantly delete them. I use to respond back when I didn’t know any better.
Obviously if they aren’t keeping up with what Google is doing I can’t even imagine anyone taking them up on their offers. Think they’ll get the message soon? Probably not!
Thanks for the humor today and nice to know they aren’t just picking on me.
Hey Lisa, have a great weekend okay!
~Adrienne
Adrienne recently posted..What Kind Of Legacy Will You Leave
Thanks Adrienne, and can you believe I had the same one email again today to see if I was interested? I am almost determined to send him this piece, but don’t want to crush their ego. Have a nice weekend yourself too! It’s finally here
Hey Lisa. Ya i too get a whole lot of mails. But i ignore most of those. Out of which many are fake and spam. Some says please review our product with so and so details and the link given for it. But they turn out again once the job is done. Sometimes it creeps me out. well any way have a great weekend.
Sunil Prajapat recently posted..How To Fix The Blue Screen Error
Thanks Sunil, nice to know it’s not just me
Have a great weekend yourself too!
I have been getting these non-stop lately!!! Thanks for sharing, I always love your posts!!!
Nicole
Nicole recently posted..Meet Amelia McDonell-Parry, Editor-in-Chief of The Frisky, and Her W.O.W.
Thanks Nicole, I’m still getting them too – they just make me laugh before I delete.
Although, technically, these type of emails are spam, a lot of people actually fall for these type of emails. We have had a few instances where a client thinks they have lost backlinks because the email tells them to use Google’s inaccurate link: operator; without Webmaster Tools it can sometimes be hard to explain that Google is wrong.
Dominique recently posted..The cookie crumbles for central government
Interesting Dominque, thanks for that tidbit.